I’m Not Kidding, I’m Asking Him for Lottery Numbers

Some of you who read here regularly may remember that my son, Sam, has excellent luck. Unbelievable, really. He wins things.

I have never, in any of my 42 years, won anything. Not that I’m bitter.

IMPORTANT BACKGROUND ITEM #1: Last year, while begrudgingly attending a performance of his sister’s play, Sam won seventy bucks in a raffle, during intermission. Then when he entered another raffle, a mere two days after the first, amidst concerned, maternal warnings that most buyers of raffle tickets do not actually win anything, especially not twice, he won the coveted half-hour massage gift certificate.

I worried about the lesson in all this. Gambling = getting stuff. Argh. Then again, it’s hard to argue with a two-for-two winner.

IMPORTANT BACKGROUND ITEM #2: Sam also enjoys lying convincing me of things. For example, when I say, “Sam, I need you to come over here so we can get your homework going!” he likes to point to a spot just behind me and say something exclamatory, such as, “MOM!! LOOK!! FLYING MONKEYS!!” When I look, he runs away. If he wants, say, a cell phone to call his own, he says that he won one and tells me where to pick it up.

So when he tells me things that seem to be a tad, shall we say, unlikely? I’m a little skeptical.

Yesterday, he came home from school and flopped himself on the couch.

Me: How was school, bud?

Sam: Oh, fine, I guess.

Me: Did anything interesting happen at Chess Club?

Sam: Oh. Well, no, but during lunch I won a bike.

Me (laughing, as I playfully punch him in the arm): Har! That’s funny, Sam.

Sam (with smirky, I-really-hope-she-buys-this smile): No, really. And Chess Club was good, too. I won my match.

Then, we went on to discuss the cold, rainy weather, what I was making for dinner (spaghetti), and the fact that it was quiet since the girls weren’t home yet. Sam got up to go get a snack, and I went looking for his backpack, to see what we had in store for homework.

Yeah, right. He won a bike. Har! How funny.

Then, I opened his binder and found a note penned in big, red, teacher handwriting. The note said, “WOW! SAM WON A BIKE!”

Um. Whut?

Unbeknownst to me, Sam’s school participates in a program in which kids earn points for making healthy lunch choices. Choose healthy items over junkier ones; earn tickets. Prize drawings are held throughout the year, for CD’s and books and pencils. Yesterday, they held the Big Grand Prize Drawing during lunch.

And now he’s the proud owner of the biggest, baddest, sweetest set of red wheels I’ve ever seen.

sambikesm.jpg

The Boy rejoices.

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6 responses to “I’m Not Kidding, I’m Asking Him for Lottery Numbers

  1. I have to fly to Vegas for work in January. I’ve already called The Doc’s school and gotten him out of of class for the week. I need him with me. We will be staying in the highroller suite at Mandalay Bay. I’ve arranged for us to be comped for all meals, Monday through Sunday. I’ll have him back in time for school the following Monday. Thanks in advance.

    Works for me! But I get half. -KDF

  2. Wow! Now that is a useful gene to have passed on!
    Cheers

  3. Yay Sam! I hope some of that good luck rubs off on me. We’re having a contest at work for the next two weeks. The top CSL each day will win a gift card.

    *prays for high traffic and wealthy shoppers*

  4. That is crazy. Think he can pass some lottery numbers my way. There is a 6 bedroom I have my eye on that I could never get on my salary ;-)

  5. If he does New York numbers, let me know.

  6. Pingback: And Now, He’s Four for Four « Why Would I Sleep?

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